(no subject)

[scienceexplains.livejournal.com]

The baby's finally asleep - all it took was a bottle, a few Cole Porter songs, and about six hundred laps around the living room. I'm pleased to report, however, that no chemical sleep aids were required, and narrowly averting a potential case of infantile alcohol poisoning also means more beer for me. I think I've earned one.

Ishmael is guarding the cradle, and an onlooker who had no knowledge of the surrounding circumstances - that this child is not mine, that he is one of humanity's last chances of survival - might mistake this for a cozy domestic scene.

[Filter: Angel, Cordelia Chase]

It would seem that this experiment does not involve any sort of daycare, and God knows I can't leave Luke here with my roommate tomorrow. Would it be all right if I brought him into work?

Comments

[ Filter: Scully, Angel ]

[disparages]

It might be nice to see a baby around the office again. Kinda nostalgic. But yeah, bring the kid in!

[heatstruck.livejournal.com]

You take stuff too seriously.

[scienceexplains.livejournal.com]

"Stuff" like child endangerment?

[Filter: Cordelia]

[scienceexplains.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[Filter: Cordelia]

[scienceexplains.livejournal.com]

You didn't get one, I take it?

[heatstruck.livejournal.com]

He's fine! We were having fun watching TV together. Isn't that what families do?

[Filter: Scully]

[disparages]

Nah. I went to my old apartment and checked, since that's like my official place of residence, but no baby. Just a lot of bills. I mean, I guess my old roommate could have taken it for a walk or something, but that would mean he was replaced with his evil- or actually, his good twin.

[scienceexplains.livejournal.com]

Generally families don't watch soft-core pornography together, no.

[Filter: Cordelia]

[scienceexplains.livejournal.com]

You never know, maybe Mr. Dalton has unplumbed depths of paternal feeling.

[Filter: Scully]

[disparages]

Hey, just a head's up. Angel might be a little funny about the baby. Just so you don't think it's cause of you, I'll tell you- but please don't mention it to anybody else. Angel had a baby son for a while and we used to take care of him around the office. He might really start missing him if he sees your kid. It's not your problem, but I thought you should know.

[Filter: Scully]

[disparages]

Yeah, right.

[heatstruck.livejournal.com]

Half the TV here is porn! I'm not complaining, lady but it is a fact and you had better get used to it.

[Filter: Cordelia]

[scienceexplains.livejournal.com]

Are you sure it's a good idea for me to bring him in, then? I might be able to find a sitter, if Luke's presence will upset Angel.

[scienceexplains.livejournal.com]

Honestly, a child this age doesn't know what he's seeing, so I doubt a little porn will hurt it. But no alcohol, and no baby-fighting. I mean it.

I can't believe I'm saying this.

[heatstruck.livejournal.com]

Hey, if another baby challenges him, he has to respond. Self defense.

[Filter: Scully]

[disparages]

Let's just test the water for a day. Angel's a strong guy.

[scienceexplains.livejournal.com]

That's actually a rather amusing mental image, so I'll leave it. But please understand that if anything happens to this child while he is in our care, it will go badly for you.

I'm not above encouraging Selina to follow through on her threats.

[misskittyclaws.livejournal.com]

I'm starting to think I got lucky in the roommate lotto.

[misskittyclaws.livejournal.com]

And I have such good follow through too!

[heatstruck.livejournal.com]

She's got it in for me, but don't worry. I'll protect this baby. Though I bet he can fight.. Look at his arms. He's already got a mega punch. Probably water beam, too.

[scienceexplains.livejournal.com]

Dr. Cox's bark is worse than his bite, and I've no doubt that you can handle him.

And he's an adult, as well as a parent. Living with Axel sometimes makes me feel like the headmistress of a school for delinquent youth.

[heatstruck.livejournal.com]

I'm gonna let you have that cause you're hormonal.

[scienceexplains.livejournal.com]

Water beam? Are you talking about squirt guns? Axel, he can barely find his own nose.

[heatstruck.livejournal.com]

I'm not a kid, I'm pretty old. But not super old. Old enough. I don't really know, to be honest.

[heatstruck.livejournal.com]

un No? I am talking about battle, woman. He'll learn quick, I'm a good teacher.

[misskittyclaws.livejournal.com]

Whatever makes you feel better about yourself, Zima.

[misskittyclaws.livejournal.com]

I'd guess... twelve.

[scienceexplains.livejournal.com]

I know you're not literally a kid, but your ... distinctive outlook and habits make me feel old by contrast.

[scienceexplains.livejournal.com]

I don't feel there's any point in discussing this any further. This child is primarily my responsibility, and I will not have him trained as a fighter.

Besides, Axel, fighting was this world's downfall. If you want to be helpful, teach him how to terraform a nuclear wasteland.

[heatstruck.livejournal.com]

I don't think so.

[giantego]

I hate children that aren't mine. If we get one, I want nothing to do with it.

[misskittyclaws.livejournal.com]

I'd rev up the bantermobile here, but it sounds like you have a kid or kids that were left behind when you came here. Which is downright shitty.

No problem, I'm fine with babies.

[giantego]

Too worked up to rant. Hospital go boom. Cox smash, etc. But yes, kids plural. Two. And yes it is.

Good. Here's to hoping they skip over us anyway.