cha'

[robotsexual.livejournal.com]

Dear Secret Santa,

I am a man of simple yet sophisticated tastes. My preferred cigars are Habanos (don't know if they have them in this world but you can't expect me to do all the work here, come on). Personal massages are an excellent nonmonetary gift (if you're a guy a gift certificate will have to do, sorry about the gender inequality). And I always, always welcome new methods of smiting my enemies. You're a talented bunch, go wild.

Sincerely,
Warren Mears


In other news, I have acquired a weapon of mass destruction. Her name is Tesla and okay, she's pretty much with the licking of faces right now but soon, soon she will be removing them. It's a work in progress, people.

Comments

[magicbone]

you got a new w



you WHAT

[robotsexual.livejournal.com]

The first attack target for which I will train her are people under five feet.

[ex_wells219]

And it licks faces?

[magicbone]

FIVE FOOT TWO

[robotsexual.livejournal.com]

For now, Andrew.

For now.

[magicbone]

oh my god never mind it doesn't even matter, I get it, I'm short but WHAT ARE YOU TRAINING, WARREN

[robotsexual.livejournal.com]

And you have narrowly escaped death yet again. How do you do it?

[ex_wells219]

...Hellhounds?

[magicbone]

um I dunno, usually Buffy saves me or Andrew wishes something or maybe I just ate my vegetables.

[magicbone]

where did he get hellhounds?

[robotsexual.livejournal.com]

Don't worry so much dude, I had a coupon. No banks were robbed in the acquisition of this weapon.

[magicbone]

no, that's stupid. um. I'm sure they're not hellhounds, Andrew.

[ex_wells219]

He had a coupon?

[magicbone]

right because I have no reason to worry.

[magicbone]

FOR HELLHOUNDS?

[magicbone]

NAMED TESLA?

[robotsexual.livejournal.com]

Duly noted, Popeye.

[ex_wells219]

Hellhound singular?

[ex_wells219]

Actually, that's kind of lame.

[magicbone]

a nickname that doesn't suck, how refreshing!

[magicbone]

Tesla might actually be the lamest name ever. um, ever.

[robotsexual.livejournal.com]

You caught me in a good mood, what can I say.

[notwalking]

Wicked.

[robotsexual.livejournal.com]

 

[magicbone]

I know, you gave up the short thing pretty quickly.