indesolution | (no subject)

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michael corner

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LET'S TRY THIS AGAIN, BABYLON. GO BACK IN TIME. GIVE ME A FUCKING TIME TURNER. SOME BLOODY MIRACLE THING LIKE THAT, ALL RIGHT? SOMETHING THAT'LL TAKE ME OUT OF HERE.

BY THE WAY, MORE INTERESTING THAN HARRY POTTER, THANKS.

Not that you're not interesting, Potter! Just less interesting. Kind of broody, if you ask me. Can't be very uplifting to read those things.

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minor Harry Potter characters ftw?

NOT MINOR. VERY IMPORTANT. I ALMOST DIED SAVING A FIRSTIE.

oh yeah that part! I totally remember now. um, welcome to Babylon.

So you've read about the amazing adventures of Michael Corner?

um I'm almost done with Deathly Hallows finally so. yeah, you could say that.

Which one's that again? BECAUSE I WAS THERE FOR A LOT OF HARRY'S LIFE, YOU KNOW.

um. your seventh year. you're kind of not in his life there.

RIGHT. I WAS FIGHTING THE WAR.

Note to self: book title. The Amazing Adventures of Michael Corner.

And....

What?

New title: The Uninspired Adventures Of Michael Corner, Fucking Prick.

CORRECTION.

The Extremely Inspired Adventures of Michael Corner, Fucking Gorgeous Prick.

Most boring book ever. Plus that title's too long.

Oh, fuck off, Ant.

Oh, I love it so when you swear at me, Mike.

Suck me harder, bitch?

Er, that's a little too much, thanks Mike. But hey, whatever floats your goat.

Just saying that to hide how turned on you are. Don't worry—I'm sure it's okay to wank here.

I dunno, they might consider that wasteful.

Wonder if we can get paid for that.

Who are you calling minor.

um don't blame me, blame JK Rowling?

I do, oh how I do.

I wouldn't think so, either.

Hey, we won, didn't we? That's uplifting.

At least we're together, right? You, me and Terry, against the fucking world.

SOME SHIT LIKE THAT SURE.

I knew you'd always follow me into Hell, Ant. Like the Dark, just less Death Cab-ish.

No no no, you followed me.

But that means you died, Ant.

Well. Shit. If I did, I don't fucking remember it.

Wait, shit. If you followed me, I died.

FUCK.

Think our funerals are in the book? I mean, I don't have a phoenix, but I reckon it'd still be a memorable affair.

I don't think we're dead. Potter's still here and he didn't die.

Oh my lord it's Mike Corner! I'm going to have to go put warning signs on your apartment for all the ladies; watch out for this bloke!!

Still look fit, Ginny! Sure you still want Potter?

Positive, Mike. But I'm glad you're here.

WELL IF YOU EVER CHANGE YOUR MIND I'm sure we could bang a few times casually. They like that here, I've heard.

Thanks, but I like my men a little less completely egotistical these days.

Potter's even more of a celebrity here!

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