(no subject)

[notwalking]

I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by
     madness, starving hysterical naked,
dragging themselves through the negro streets at dawn
     looking for an angry fix,
angelheaded hipsters burning for the ancient heavenly
     connection to the starry dynamo in the macery of night,
who poverty and tatters and hollow-eyed and high sat
     up smoking in the supernatural darkness of
     cold-water flats floating across the tops of cities
     contemplating jazz

Look. Let's forget yesterday ever fucking happened. I'm going to, at least.

Thanks for the career advice, Petrelli. Misguided as it was, I'm acting on it. You'll thank me later.

In honor of tomorrow, I'm flipping a coin. Heads, I drop out of school once and for all. Tails, I hold out until graduation.


Ah, it landed on its side. What were the odds. I am the master of my fate.

Comments

[ex_whoosh450]

Good for you, kid.

[notwalking]

We'll see how long that lasts.

[ex_whoosh450]

I've had enough bullshit today, so I'll just say I hope you go far. Should do the whole stay in school lecture, but I doubt you'd listen anyway.

[notwalking]

Thanks for sparing me. Sir.

[deliberately]

You're gonna drop out?

[notwalking]

I'm going to pursue my career, yes.

[deliberately]

A couple more months and we'll be done with school forever anyway, what's the point?

[notwalking]

I'm not learning anything useful, the teachers are, in fact, worse than the ones we had at Hellton, and I'm not interested in anything the university has to offer. So there's no point in staying. The point is that there are bigger things on the horizon.

[deliberately]

I just wanna know I finished high school. Otherwise it'll feel like I've just wasted all that time there. Still... you said that yesterday.

[notwalking]

I figure I was expelled once before, there wasn't much point in me going back anyway.

I did. And I meant it.

[deliberately]

You would have left if it had been real.

[notwalking]

Thank you for stating the obvious.

[deliberately]

I can't just forget that.

[notwalking]

Can you blame me for wanting to get out of this place? Really.

[deliberately]

I guess not. But you were just going to leave us behind.

[ Filter: Neil ]

[notwalking]

That was kind of one of the hang ups. Given more time and, you know, less of a fucking blind panic, it wouldn't have happened like that.

And anyway, it doesn't matter now. It was a joke, I'm still here, you can stop being a spaz about it.

[ Filter: Charlie ]

[deliberately]

I like the Ginsberg.

[ Filter: Neil ]

[notwalking]

It's apt. I've been reading a lot of his stuff lately.

[ Filter: Charlie ]

[deliberately]

So what's the big career plan? You're not actually going to try and be a pirate, are you Charlie?

[ Filter: Neil ]

[notwalking]

Don't be an idiot, there's no ocean here.

Newspaper. I'm going to start educating the public on their government. Kind of, I mean, I'm going to take whatever position they give me to start off with, but the ultimate goal is a little grander.

[ Filter: Charlie ]

[deliberately]

You're seriously going to be a journalist? That's neat, I think you'd be good at that.

[ Filter: Neil ]

[notwalking]

Thanks, slick. I think I would too. See, doing something noble with my life. You don't need to worry about me.

[ Filter: Charlie ]

[deliberately]

But I'm going to anyway. Sorry.

[ Filter: Neil ]

[notwalking]

I figured.

[ Filter: Neil ]

[notwalking]

Although the pirate thing still stands. Sword training's fun.

[ Filter: Charlie ]

[deliberately]

Swash swash, buckle buckle.

[ Filter: Neil ]

[notwalking]

More or less. Not all poetry is words, etc.

[hostbu]

Your poems are always too sad. You should go to school.

[notwalking]

They aren't sad, they're just truth.

I think it's a better idea to jump start my career, don't you?

[hostbu]

I enjoy school, so I'm not sure I agree.

[notwalking]

Life is my school.

[truthmeasurer.livejournal.com]

I knew they couldn't do nothing like that.

[notwalking]

Yeah, well. I fell for it.

[truthmeasurer.livejournal.com]

I would've too if I didn't know better, Charlie.

[notwalking]

It won't happen again. If anything, it was just another strike against the government. If they're that easily manipulated, who's to say that when they actually figure their shit out, people will trust them? Or even believe them?

[truthmeasurer.livejournal.com]

I don't trust anyone. Government are just people, and there are lots of kinds of those. I met a lotta them, and some were good and they helped, but I didn't trust them, either. I dunno what this portal is made outta, but last time one of those were made someone I was close to died.

But it en't about that, either.

[notwalking]

You have to trust some people.

Then what's it about?

[truthmeasurer.livejournal.com]

Yeah, some people en't here. I can do fine by myself.

Fear and sin. That's what it seems like it's always about.

[notwalking]

That's unfortunate. I bet they'll turn up. Practically everyone from my world did without me doing a single thing about it.

That's life.

[truthmeasurer.livejournal.com]

If he doesn't, I en't worried either. As long as he's happy. I dunno if I wanna subject him to this type a' thing again.

Yeah, it is.

[notwalking]

That's a good way of looking at things, Lyra.

[truthmeasurer.livejournal.com]

Sometimes I think I'd rather be selfish.

[notwalking]

It's an easier way to live, yeah.