VIII

[qinglongweiji.livejournal.com]

[ Filter: Suzaku ]

How are you doing in your studies?

[ Filter: Public ]

It seems as if I have a new roommate. I will miss my old one.

And there's a ball; it's been ages since I've been something like that. Then again, it's been ages since I've celebrated any sort of holiday.

Comments

[ Filter: Sifu Vilma ]

[honorarily.livejournal.com]

I haven't found a tutor yet outside of mathematics. An old friend wishes to tutor me, but ...

Well, can I ask your advice on that?

[ Filter: Suzaku ]

[qinglongweiji.livejournal.com]

I'll help how I can. What would you like my advice on?

[ Filter: Sifu Vilma ]

[honorarily.livejournal.com]

Ah, the other person that offered to help me was an old friend of mine. We were friends when we were children, and then I thought we were when we were older, but he changed. ... Or I guess he grew up to who he was supposed to be. He has a power that allows him to tell anyone to do something that he tells them to do, and ... he told his sister, and my ... well, he told Euphemia to kill all the Japanese. He said he wanted to take over the world, and he didn't care who he killed in the process.

It ... all I ever wanted to do was change things, but he thought it was stupid, and then all I wanted to do was take my revenge on him. But I wasn't able to because we ended up here.

When we were talking, it was just as it had always been, but I can't trust that things will go back to normal.

I ... guess I'm confused. Euphie promises that things won't be the same way again, because I said I'll stop it. But she ... I guess she twisted what I meant when I said that. I never meant it that way.

I want to hate him, and I want to hurt him for what he's done, but I can't at the same time. The feeling of hatred that guided me toward trying to take revenge for the first time isn't there anymore.

[ Filter: Suzaku ]

[qinglongweiji.livejournal.com]

I see.

Which part of this situation would you like advice on?

[ Filter: Sifu Vilma ]

[honorarily.livejournal.com]

I need advice as to how to approach the situation. I'd ... like my best friend back, but he's not the same. And I thought I could hate him, but I can't.

[ Filter: Suzaku ]

[qinglongweiji.livejournal.com]

You don't have to forgive him. It, perhaps, is cliché to repeat these words, however ... if you have accepted what he's become, you have a choice. You have to decide how important he is to you, and what's important to yourself.

It's the execution of your ideals that's difficult. Once you have that figured out, you'll know what to do, and what you want.

[ Filter: Sifu Vilma ]

[honorarily.livejournal.com]

I can still be friends with him without forgiving him for his actions?

I know it's difficult. ... But I'll never stop trying.

[ Filter: Suzaku ]

[qinglongweiji.livejournal.com]

Of course you can, as long as you accept it.