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[captnkennit.livejournal.com]

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And again, prison. I weary of it. This time my plans to lay low were defeated by something beyond my understanding. This must not happen again. Nuwanda seemed to be maddened by the experience; I was bored, and I'm tired of my thoughts, which run like circles.

Still, I saw who else was imprisoned there. People to keep an eye on, perhaps; interesting people.

They are planning a parade, which means within a month it will be one year since I arrived here in this strange place. I think I have perhaps become too used to it. That is not something I want to celebrate.

The idea of finding a job is abhorrent to me and yet, I'm going to have to grit my teeth and bear it.

I still ache, physically, for the ocean.


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Yet each man kills the thing he loves
By each let this be heard,
Some do it with a bitter look,
Some with a flattering word,
The coward does it with a kiss,
The brave man with a sword!

Some kill their love when they are young,
And some when they are old;
Some strangle with the hands of Lust,
Some with the hands of Gold:
The kindest use a knife, because
The dead so soon grow cold.

Some love too little, some too long,
Some sell, and others buy;
Some do the deed with many tears,
And some without a sigh:
For each man kills the thing he loves,
Yet each man does not die.
oscar wilde - the ballad of reading gaol

Prison is still excruciatingly boring and I'm glad to be free of it, especially since I've now gained a second strike for something I don't even remember doing and had no hand in planning. I'm sure Sofer will be disappointed to know it did not drive me mad. I doubt it would have even after years and years. I think I am sounder of mind than that.

I miss adventure.

Comments

[hostbu]

What a sad poem.

[captnkennit.livejournal.com]

My apologies, it seemed fitting. It's an extract. Do you like poetry?

[hostbu]

I do! Though so many of the poems I see here are tragic. I wish this was a happier place for many people.

[captnkennit.livejournal.com]

I am sure it would be happier if people were not unjustly imprisoned.

[hostbu]

My friends were hurt from whatever happened to all of you. Sometimes we have to do things that aren't fair to keep our precious people safe.

[captnkennit.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry your friends were hurt. I, too, found out that someone I cared for was hospitalized.

[hostbu]

Lyra, wasn't it?

[captnkennit.livejournal.com]

Yes.

[hostbu]

She's my friend too. She's safe now but. It was a very upsetting time for everyone.

[notwalking]

She was? Shit.

Sorry Haruhi got hurt.

[hostbu]

Please apologize to her, not me.

[notwalking]

Wait, why.

[hostbu]

Because Haruhi was the one who was hurt. I'm just a man who didn't do anything.

[notwalking]

Yeah, well, my friend got hurt too. And I kind of had a direct hand in that. So I know how shitty it feels. Thus, sorry.

[hostbu]

I know. I'm sorry about what happened to Knox. But I see you sometimes and I still feel angry. I know I'm mad at myself and not you, and I hope you don't take it badly. But I'll understand if you do.

[notwalking]

People have a right to be pissed off at me. Go for it.

[hostbu]

It's not fair to you.

[notwalking]

In your case? It kind of is.

[hostbu]

I know you didn't want to hurt those people. You're not a person who wants to cause pain to other people. You're a good man.

[notwalking]

Thanks.

[tokencommoner]

It wasn't your fault.

[notwalking]

Yeah, I've heard that one before. None of us knew what we were doing. Who hurt you?

[tokencommoner]

You've heard it before because it's a valid point. It wasn't something you wanted to do.

[notwalking]

No, believe me. I know that. A guy could feel bad about it anyway.